Vulnerability

High spirits without
Deep emptiness within 
The higher
The deeper.
Loud music and laughter
What is this search
Much activity, increased social posts,
Dark wasteland stretching far.
How much more to go? 
Where to? 
Exploring, experiencing, celebrating
Running from the shadows.
The shadow trying to escape;
An empty self 
asking Who am I.
Not this, no longer
Not that, no longer. 
A crowd of friends milling about.
Alone, untouchable, untouched. 
A lonely search
Discarding all the knowns
Further emptiness,
If that is possible. 
Brave statements with background music
Pitch perfect silence;
Shall the twain never meet?